Start Your Engines

Your cadillac has got a wheel in the ditch and one on the track

2007-08-29T11:43:00.000-05:00

This week I've really missed Missouri.

I hate the traffic here. Last night stop lights were out at two major intersections. I'm not talking flashing- I mean OUT. Its already a clusterfuck and everyone wants to get home. I really I get this job where I can work at home. Even a job downtown so I can ride the train. I just don't want to drive anymore.

I miss the familiarity. I didn't realize how comforting it is know where shit is and know the people once you get there. It was nice to call someone and say, "Meet me at Eastside in 10 minutes for a drink."

...and I miss my people.

On the flipside, living here is cool. There's so much to do and learn and see. Maybe I'm too apathetic and I want it all right away without paying the dues. I just don't like this loner lifestyle. I'm not a loner at heart.

I am excited for this evening. Melanie is having a dinner party at her house in Wrigleyville, so I shall venture south. It'll be nice to see some friendly faces and meet new people.

Also, I got a new phone yesterday. Its pink and pretty and I maybe fondling it too much. The most important thing- It WORKS! So call me now and we shall talk for hours.

I've decided. Neil Young makes me really happy. I think I am a fifty-year-old trapped in this body.

Half a mile from the county fair and the rain keep pouring down

2007-08-26T21:37:00.000-05:00

Me and billy standin there
With a silver half a crown
Hands are full of a fishin rod
And the tackle on our backs
We just stood there gettin wet
With our backs against the fence

I've been posting on myspace, but I realize the entire fam is not on myspace. Therefore, duplicate postings shall appear here. If you are on myspace, don't waste your time.

Here's the scoop- If you called me in the last week or so and I have yet to call you back, please be patient. I am having phone issues and need a new one. It should be taken care of this week sometime. Then we'll talk til the cows come home.

In the past week: huge storms went through, but missed our house and cars. Other cars had huge tree limbs on top of them and the trees in Lincoln Park (a couple miles south) were broken off at the ground. Along with the torrentual downpour came flooding and nasty, swampy gutters. However, we are fine and our shit is fine.

We opened the pasture gate and let the matching bikes ramble along the lakefront bike trail. It was beautiful and cool along the beach. Like I said, we only had to dodge some fallen trees.

Friday, Will scouted an Irish pub with live music and no cover on the fringes of downtown. There was authentic Irish music mixed in with old rock and roll. The cool thing is, we got drunk and rode the train home. The not-so-cool thing: there is construction on our line and we had a wait longer than usual. Bah humbug. Its really only a problem when your bladder is an eigth of a normal persons. And you drank a lot of Guinness.

Yesterday, I ran into someone from college who knows Shannon. She now lives in the city, not far from us. Apparently, I am a magnet for this sort of thing.

Will got a job. Yay! I am waiting to hear back from the interview I had last week. I would be working from home, which means no COMMUTE!

Mom called me today to say Rachel is settling in at college. Apparently, a scheduled freshmen outting consisted of climbing Mt. Washington in New Hampshire. Mizzou, you robbed me.

Hope everyone is well. i have to scoot off to work. I'll be in touch soon, promise.

You better leave my kitten all alone

2007-03-26T10:18:00.000-05:00

Its been a minute.

The trip home was fun, but not relaxing. It was a mess of "lets go here, we have to eat there, you must me this person." My traveling buddy was patient and enjoyed himself, or so he says. I had my birthday horseshoe and Guinness.

I hurt my leg at roller derby about two weeks ago. Finally, the swelling subsided and its beginning to feel like normal again. Last night I skated with no negative side affects.

Spring is presenting itself as my sanity saver. The sun is out, the temp is up and the social calendar is filling. It appears April and May are full of visits, weddings and other things to look forward to. Hooray for spring!

Today: two phone interviews. Its time, folks. I think I need to blow this Popsicle stand.

I have seen a hundred white doves flying

2007-03-08T16:20:00.000-06:00

Forgiving is difficult.

On occasion, I've run very far, been a little hungry and gotten some narly tangles in my hair. Life is full of mountains to climb, but the steepest thus far is forgiving.

Its more complicated when blame and unhappiness are coupled with it. I think those are the foothills. I'm trying to make my own happiness, so no one else is responsible. Before, I relied on one person; now, I'm learning to rely on myself. Blame is harder, but in the future, there will be no one to blame.

This is the hardest task of my adult life so far. We'll see how I do. I think if I tackle it, I could be one hell of a person.

In other news, I fell at practice last night. Strike that. Two people clobbered me at practice and I am hurting. Padded shorts are necessary. We are improving quickly, and it makes me happy and fulfilled.

I got brand new roller skates/ you've got a brand new key

2007-02-13T17:13:00.000-06:00

Add another tally to the "oops, probably should've gotten stitches" list. A glass bit me while I was attempting to wash him...after I dug my car out from the storm last night to go to work and make $4 in tips. That's right. $4.

The one thing I'm looking forward to is getting my new skates tomorrow. Delish.

Add some Fugitive wheels and I'll be burning past you!

You broke my will/ what a thrill

2007-01-23T18:50:00.000-06:00

I played in the snow Saturday night with Elliott and Sam and Adam. There is something very theraputic about getting white-washed. No really. I left a little drunk, very tired, wet and cold (but I didn't care). Sometimes you gotta wash off and start new.

Roller derby meeting and them maybe some Eastside guitar hero.

Peace.

Once I was strong but I lost the fight/ you won't find a better loser.

2007-01-17T16:14:00.000-06:00

This weather...Jesus. I almost busted my ass carrying my laundry out of my apartment. Thankfully, I have jungle cat reflexes (and achy muscles from catching myself mid-stumble). I really do appreciate my four wheel drive, but I lamented as a snow-covered camaro passed me today. It was a totally sissy, girl car, but I loved it. Next, similar car- much bigger engine.

Last night, Damage threw a party to celebrate Sara's annulment. She made a great dinner, complete with champagne and Better than Sex cake. We decided the cake was excellent, but the title was relative. At different times in one's life it might apply. I brought a little Jack in my flask.

Afterward, we went to Pepper's. I had never been and it has a certain ambiguous reputation. Some people think its a gay bar. Some think its a rundown night club, etc. When we arrived there were three other people in the place. They showed us how to run the karaoke machine and we went to town. Sara made me sing Faith Hill. Adriene thrashed to Green Day. Damage sang (appropriately) Goodbye Earl. It was amazing. We giggled drunkenly. I think we all needed to blow off some steam. I spun the truck all across the icy parking lot to make the girls laugh. I woke with a headache. It was a good night.

To change the subject...have you ever want to burn everything you own because it all has some sentimental value? Sometimes it just seems it would be easier to trash it all and start over. I hate that I wore my ugly sweater today and even it reminds me of shit. How do you shuck what used to bring happiness and now brings frustration or disappointment?

When you end a relationship, one thing that goes through your head is, " I'll never have to hear___ again." The terrible part is even though the person is gone, my memory is too good. It lurks, makes me question myself, makes me less receptive to good things. Yes, there were good things, too, but they seem shadowed compared to the bad. Its a weighing of the evils.

For a long time, he had me convinced. I'm trying to climb out of that dark cell into the sunlight. I just want to believe I deserve to be happy. My head says yes, but my heart isn't sure. Its bruised and I need it to believe before any real healing can happen.

It sounds trite, but helping start this roller derby thing has been really good. It is giving me an outlet. I get some exercise, meet new people and my brain is turned on again. I'm organizing, brainstorming and being a driving force in a new organization that excites many people. I'm getting a peek at my old self again. The lazy haze is peeling back. I'm starting to remember what I used to be like seven, eight years ago. I was optimistic. I didn't think it would happen again. Maybe I was wrong.

Birthday news...if all goes well, I think Will and I will be home for my birthday (March 16-18). This means St. Pat's parade in Springfield, etc. Let me know if you want to get together.

This hit home...

2007-01-13T01:50:00.000-06:00

Well she was precious like a flower

She grew wild, wild but innocent

A perfect prayer in a desperate hour

She was everything beautiful and different

Stupid boy…you can't fence that in

Stupid boy…it's like holdin' back the wind

She laid her heart and soul right in your hands

And you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans

She never even knew she had a choice

And that's what happens when the only voice

She hears is telling her she can't

Stupid boy

So what made you think you could take a life

And just push it, push it around

I guess to build yourself up so high

You had to take her and break her down

You always had to be right

And now you lost the only thing that ever made you feel alive

Oh I'm the same old, same old stupid boy

It took awhile for her to figure out she could run

But when she did, she was long gone, long gone

Its interesting...I find myself trying to explain why I react the way I do. I was always waiting for the bottom to fall out, the explosion to happen. I'm slowly learning that everyone is not as volatile, and its not necessary to explain my every neurosis. It has simply compounded into who I am, and sometimes a little mystery as to the "why" is half the charm.

In other news, roller derby is progressing swimmingly. Twenty-four girls involved already. In the next couple months a fundraiser will be announced. I'll keep you all posted. Check it out on myspace. The link is on my friends list. My handle has also been changed to my roller derby name as it stands.

Its sleeting in Mid-Mo. What happened to spring in January?

Time is on my side.

2007-01-04T17:11:00.000-06:00

Last night I went skating- roller, that is. It appears I am one of the first members of Columbia's women's roller derby team. What's better than getting some exercise and knocking other chicks down while wearing a skirt? Sara's into it and so is our other friend, Lindsey. It should be a good time. Gonna start skating two or three times a week. Dad needs to ship me my skates :)

This morning I got up at 7:30, went home, ran for an hour, went to work and now I'm officially sore. Good sore. Kicked my ass sore.

Tonight is up in the air. Maybe making dinner. I really want cornbread. Don't ask me why.

Thanks, mom.

2007-01-03T15:04:00.000-06:00

I don't care if I got no money, I don't care if I got a dime.
All I want to do is to dance with you honey,
please tell me that you have the time.

Cause I gotta get back on my feet again, gotta get back on the street again.

I don't care if I got no fame, all I want to do is to hold your hand.
Don't care if nobody knows my name cause I just want to try the best I can.

Gotta get back on my feet again, gotta get back on the street again.

Well, I don't know just what the world is coming to.
And I don't know just what is going on, and momma do you?

Well, all I really know is I gotta get back on my feet again.

Break my rusty cage and run.

2007-01-01T21:56:00.000-06:00

Christmas was great. I got to see the family and received fun gifts. I always need a new sparkly purse and new jewelry. I've also entered the land of the living with a hand-me-down tv. Thanks, Dad. My favorite gift was the down comforter mom gave me.

New Years was uneventful. I made Italian beef, drank a bottle of strawberry champagne and we stayed in. All-in-all, it was a relaxing night.

I think this year's gonna be a good one, tater. Afterall, you can only go up after you've been down.

I'm done with the low class bullshit and the spitefulness. I should be bigger than that and its dragging me down- taking energy from the things that really deserve my time. I just want to be rid of it. We make mistakes and life goes on. Can't we at least agree on that?

In the end

2006-12-18T23:12:00.000-06:00

I woke up this morning all warm and cuddled and remembered on this day last year I got engaged.

The shit storm that was last year is finally over. I wake up happy to be breathing and surrounded by people who make me happy. Everytime I get sentimental, I get wind of something that makes me happy its all over. Thank fucking GOD. Who needs that shit *raises hand*. Its me.

Also, I thought personal things were just that- personal. Loose lips sink ships and whatnot. I guess I was wrong. It just means that I don't have to be so tight-lipped any longer.

...and we all lose our charms in the end

2006-12-10T17:43:00.000-06:00

Life is finally feeling less...disorganized. I'm starting to have a routine and it pleases me. Thursday-ish, Sara and I make dinner. Friday/Saturday, go out for a few adult beverages. Sunday, Campus Bar and Grill for $1 burgers.

Also, I've been playing pool, usually on Fridays at Rack-n-Roll or whatever bar we end up at. I've forgotten how much I enjoy it. Pool is beginning to have a positive conotation again. I can play like shit and they still enjoy my company, tell me I'm having an off-night, and (company dependent) give me a kiss.

I need to retip the good cue. The shitty one is pissing me off.

A broom is drearily sweeping up the broken pieces of yesterday's life

2006-12-04T11:27:00.000-06:00

Went to Boonville yesterday to see an adaptation of Scrooge. It involved random Missouri-isms thrown in and it was a staged reading, complete with paper scripts. At least it was free and the cd of Christmas music they played wasn't bad.

We thought it started at 3:00, but it actually began at 4:30. In the meantime we had dinner at the casino. All of the roads in town were still pocked with icy potholes, but the casino was like a beacon- the parking lot was immaculate. I guess its all about priorities.

We shopped at Kohl's for about an hour, where I found Dad's Christmas present.

Then, we hit the Blue Note for Dr. Dog and The Black Keys. It was a good show, even sans smoking.

Now, back to the daily grind of work and getting necessary shit done. The week after the snow days is always a drag.

He checked into his room only to find Gideon's bible

2006-12-03T02:37:00.000-06:00

Snow! It involved going on safari of sorts with the 4WD to get beer and frozen pizza and a full day of eating, sleeping and movies. I kind of needed some downtime. I like when nature forces it upon me.

Today was interesting at best. Work was actually kind of busy. I met Sara, her crew, Will and Alex at Eastside for a few brews. Also much needed.

Tomorrow involves a trip to Boonville and some evening activities. I like having plans. It gives me something to look forward to.

Put another dime in the jukebox, baby

2006-11-29T23:22:00.000-06:00

Please please me

2006-11-26T23:37:00.000-06:00

I survived Thanksgiving! Yay! The stress if over, and I had a pretty good time. :)

Job interview bullshit is still going on. At least it hasn't ended. I suppose that's a good sign.

I had a great weekend, involving a birthday barhopping night for Will's roommate and a gluttonous Sunday. I did nothing productive, except help Brian hang a sheet of drywall. Hurty arms. Oh, and I ate chocolate. That was productive.

I heart mohawks.

....and you can find some interesting things on the internet if you just know where to look (or just stumble on them).

Thanks to my sisters for the drunk dial at 3:00 a.m. the day after Thanksgiving. If you want video, check out my comments on myspace. I laughed.

Damn this traffic jam/ it hurts my engine to go so slow

2006-11-15T16:17:00.000-06:00

I almost forgot...HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DAD!

For awhile, maybe longer if I do

2006-11-15T15:51:00.000-06:00

Interview in KC went well. I turned in a writing assignment to them on Monday. Hopefully, it met their expectations. If I get this job, I will have executed the greatest scam of my life. I am wholly unqualified. However, I think they liked me. The IL job is still up in the air.

I will be spending Gobble Feast in Springfield, MO. I only have two days off, and its not enough time to make the rounds at home. Sorry for my absents. Stuffing will proceed as usual.

Sara and I volunteered for a youth horse show at the county fairgrounds. It was cold, but fun. It involved a mistake in starting time, so we had breakfast at Lucas in backbone at 7:15am. Its the first time I've seen the sun come up in months. I rather enjoyed it. It involved a free t-shirt and we bought matching "I love Palominos" bracelets. The Quarter horse people didn't have any. I was then timidly asked later that evening, "What's a Palamino?" This resulted in further discussion if Palamino is a breed or coloring. I think it depends on who you ask.

Officially, I am now called Sugarbeet.

...and which one of you wierdos is checking this blog at 6:00 a.m.? Midnight, 2:00 a.m. I can understand. Get a life :)

Hate me today

2006-11-07T21:36:00.000-06:00

Today, I heard a story in passing that made me feel really shitty. I hate shit like that.

The interview in KC is tomorrow and I'm really nervous. I have an interview with a writer, managing editor and the publisher. It seems they are cramming everyone into one day. I guess that's a good sign. Maybe it will mean fewer follow-ups. I hate follow-ups.

Work and some good downtime highlighted my day. The first not necessarily a good highlight, but a big part of it. The second was fantastic.

I've been trying to figure out what my plans are for Thanksgiving. If I only have one day off, I might be headed south. I'll fill you all in when plans are finalized.

And all the people that come and go stop and say hello

2006-11-01T19:35:00.000-06:00

Happy November! This time of year is always strange for me, for its a whirlwind of pumpkins, then turkeys, then candy canes. Strange, but I love it.

Sara and I walked her dogs yesterday and then today. We toured downtown and hit campus. I had Shatzi, almost 100lbs. I'm not sure who was walking whom. Nonetheless, it was fun.

Last night included pumpkin beer at Flatbranch and a terribly awesome wierwolf movie.

Today I had the Allstar at Waffle House, am doing laundry at Sara's and hanging out at Brian's (they live next door). Now its pizza time!

I haven't heard anything from the people in IL. However, I have an interview next Wednesday near Kansas City. Its an editing/ writing position for an ag and a food mag. It would be kind of fun to move to a metro area I have never really been. Cross thy fingies!

The bad thing in life: I smoke too many cigs. Yes, mom. I know they'll kill me.

Its a hop to the left and a step to the right

2006-10-31T00:52:00.000-06:00

Oh, I've been a bad blogger this week.

Highlights of my weekend:
- Good party location. Proximity is everything.
- Watching the Dread Pirate Roberts break up green.
- People giggling when I smiled with my blacked-out tooth.
- Baking apple pie and smoking out my whole apartment. (They were still good)
- Excellent baking helper.
- Packed Buffalo Wild Wings.
- Seeing Brian doped up and grinning in a hospital gown. He threatened to moon me, and I reminded him he already has several times.
- Cockiness leads me to another job interview.
- Playing fetch with Dammit.
- Getting over feeling guilty.
- Lack of sleep and, strangly, lack of crankiness.
- Smiling like a goon.

Hope everyone has a great Halloween! I love my bat pajamas.

Oh my life is changing everyday, in every possible way.

2006-10-24T00:00:00.000-05:00

Rockstar weekend- tired and sore.

~smile~

Now all the jacks are in their boxes

2006-10-19T22:57:00.000-05:00

I received my "One Year" pin at the OG today. Boy, time flies when you are having fun . Soon I will get my bonus check.

What has happened in a year? Quite a lot, to say the least. What have I learned? Even more.

I have a follow-up call with the job in IL, and I have a phone interview for a job near Kansas City. One month of job searching is paying off. Yet shall I be a productive member of society! More importantly, a happy one.

Breathe some air that tastes like freedom

2006-10-18T18:57:00.000-05:00

Interview happened today. I drove for six hours. I am beat. Maybe I will sleep tonight, or I won't just like the last two nights. At least now I can relax and stop stressing about it.

I'm in a good mood and hopeful. What a switch. I have great friends and family. I appreciate everyone's support and good thoughts. I heart you all.

I took a Louisville Slugger to both headlights

2006-10-17T20:41:00.000-05:00

My sisters are crazy...and I love them.

Carved my name into his leather seats

2006-10-16T23:30:00.000-05:00

I can relate: (thanks, AM)

1
Wind rocks the car.
We sit parked by the river,
silence between our teeth.
Birds scatter across islands
of broken ice. Another time
I'd have said "Canada geese,"
knowing you love them.
A year, ten years from now
I'll remember this --
this sitting like drugged birds
in a glass case--
not why, only that we
were here like this together.

2
They're tearing down, tearing up
this city, block by block.
Rooms cut in half
hang like flayed carcasses,
their old roses in rags,
famous streets have forgotten
where they were going. Only
a fact could be so dreamlike.
They're tearing down the houses
we met and lived in,
soon our two bodies will be all
left standing from that era.

3
We have, as they say,
certain things in common.
I mean: a view
over slate to stiff pigeons
huddled every morning; they way
water tastes from our tap,
which you marvel at, letting
it splash into the glass.
Because of you I notice
the taste of water,
a luxury I might
otherwise have missed.

4
Our words misunderstand us.
Sometimes at night
you are my mother:
old detailed griefs
twitch at my dreams, and I
crawl against you, fighting
for shelter, making you
my cave. Sometimes
you're the wave of birth
that drowns me in my first
nightmare. I suck the air.
Miscarried knowledge twists us
like hot sheets thrown askew.

5
Dead winter doesn't die,
it wears away, a piece of carrion
picked clean at last,
rained away or burnt dry.
Our desiring does this,
make no mistake, I'm speaking
of fact; through mere indifference
we could prevent it.
Only our fierce attention
gets hyacinths out of those
hard cerebral lumps,
unwraps the wet buds down
the whole length of a stem.

I dug my keys into the side of his pretty little souped up 4-wheel drive

2006-10-15T23:47:00.000-05:00

Today was good. Brian and I had Flatbranch. I ate a chocolate chip cookie sundae. I haven't had dessert in weeks. It was wonderful.

Tonight Elliot and Adam deep-fried shrimp, sweet potatoes, bacon (yes, bacon), bananas and fake crab. It was kind of like being at the state fair. That must be why I liked it so much. Now I need a triple bypass.

Sara is out of town so I took all 11 bags of her garbage to the curb and I held the flashlight while Brian rewired a switch in his kitchen. Hot wires. Scary.

Now watching Robot Chicken. Must...pay...closer...attention.

Like red on a rose

2006-10-14T23:00:00.000-05:00

My fingers are cold, so its hard to type and taking me way too long.

Possible plans for next weekend. My work schedule is cleared just in case.

Job interview on Wednesday. Its a reporting position in a small town. The whole county gets the paper, though, so the circulation is between 10,000 and 11. Its a pretty sweet deal and close to metro STL. I'd be closer to the fam as well. Shit, I do not want to move my stuff again....six homes in 18 months. Make is stop!

My ass was handed to me on a silver platter the last two nights at work, so I am looking forward to tomorrow off. I'm going to try to go to church. I haven't been in a while, and it needs to happen.

Sara is gone for a week, so I am hanging out with Hernia Brian. Good times.

Its a nice day for a...

2006-10-11T23:18:00.000-05:00

white wedding.
.

Thanks for the pictures, Shooey. My fam will enjoy.

Oh snap!

2006-10-10T22:51:00.000-05:00

A good time was had by all...

They'll lead you 'round town like a scalded hound with your tail tucked between your legs

2006-10-07T02:33:00.000-05:00

Yes, I believe things are looking up. This is said with a sigh and a smile.

Fuck you I won't do what you tell me.

2006-10-05T00:28:00.000-05:00

Recap:

1. Going to IL for an extended weekend and wedding.
2. New hair.

Tonight I made good money. I watched Brian shoot his .22 into his kitchen drywall from the livingroom. AND I am drinking a frozen Amaretto Sour from Trops.

Life is good.

2006-10-02T00:19:00.000-05:00

A wolf in sheep's clothing will just look good while it rips out your heart.

~ME

2006-09-29T14:51:00.000-05:00

"I don't miss him, I miss who I thought he was."

~Anonymous

2006-09-27T11:35:00.000-05:00

I'm on hiatus from blogdom. I don't have the heart for it.

Beautifully broken

2006-09-13T01:16:00.000-05:00

Saturday night Adam and I cleaned the shit out of the house. Its a rare moment when all three bathrooms smell like orange Pinesol.

The last two days I worked my ass off at the OG. The district manager said we have the nicest, cleanest bar in his area. Hot damn. My thankless job was...uh...thanked today.

Rode the Raspberry to hang out with Brian and Sara. They are next door neighbors in the ghetto. We watched part of the Princess Bride and now I am home, waiting for Liam to get home from work.

Tomorrow's my day off. I'm excited. I need to find a job.

An ominous landscape of neverending calamity

2006-09-06T23:03:00.000-05:00

I had a great weekend in Illinois. I saw a bunch of familiar faces and family from out of state.

Friday I helped Molly with some wedding preparation. I vacuumed her house, which I STILL have down to a science. When I lived there, it was on the market and I think I vacuumed close to once a day.

Saturday we met at the KC hall at 9:00 to decorate. Needless to say, I was tired from AT's and my night out. Sarah brought Mel-o-cream which I miss so much. The afternoon was spent hang out at Cozy Dog, napping and getting ready.

The wedding was casual and went off without a hitch. Well, there was a "hitching", but only the good kind. My uncle drank his Stag while riding the pony. My great aunt who's 86 and just had a stroke danced until 11. After, most of the cousins met at mom's and drank some vodka. It was the best Spengler party in a long time.

The bad news was the amount of money I forked over for gas.

Patty gave me an awesome road bike. It needs brake pads, and then I'm going to ride it. I took the Suburban out for its first ride tonight. Liam did an awesome job setting it up for me. She's a champ.

We ran a bunch of errands today including the bike shop twice, Powder Horn gun shop, army surplus and Bass Pro. God, we are rednecks extrodinaire. The good news is Elliott and Liam put Mom's old Le Tour together, turning it fixed gear. It looks really nice.

The momocycle had some issues, but I got a few kinks ironed out. The hand brake light switch was out, so I jacked one off the parts bike and replaced it. Both headlights were burned out so those are now replaced with some wiring fenagling. Now all that needs to be done is swap the rear tire and figure out why she's leaking oil.

Mom gave me Jerry's medium format camera. It lit a fire under my ass: I've been really apathetic about photography, and I really miss it. Today I bought batteries for the medium format Pentax and a new battery for the Mamiya. I picked up some Fuji and removed corrosion from battery contacts. I priced really expensive bags and MF developing.

At very least, I need to take some photos of the boys' garage. Its a little ridiculous.

Tater, its been a good day.

We'll all be flying higher than a jet airliner

2006-08-27T02:15:00.000-05:00

soooo....

Big and Rich was awesomely hot until the downpour. However, the show was really good, and Liam got me a little piece of the guitar they smashed. The red cowboy hat was out in full force. It was also great to see Andrew and hang out with the fam.

I'll be in IL again Labor Day weekend for AM's wedding. Its kind of fun working four long days and then having three off. I still need to finish my dress, find/make a belt and buy shoes. Damn, I guess I'll have to do a little shopping.

Tomorrow, I need to figure out what's up with the headlight on my momocycle and possibly swap out the rear wheel from the parts bike, because my tread is gone. I can't wait to have my day off from work.

I just got back from a party thrown by some coworkers. Man do I feel old in this town. It was also quite annoying that some drunk assholes kept calling me "helmet girl." I didn't leave it on the bike, because I didn't want some drunk shit to steal it and for me to have no way home (MO has a helmet law). I should have followed through on the instinct to pop him in the nose with said helmet. I would have felt better and he would have learned a valuable lesson. Alas, I was not drinking.

Grandma gave me her and grandpa's bikes that had been in her basement for years. They are matching green Schwinn Suburbans from when Schwinn was still made in Chicago. I am looking forward to getting mine up and running when I have some spare cash for parts. Its gonna be sweet.

I love my little Habib. He is attached to me at the hip...er...ankle when I am in the house. He's currently snoring in my lap and when I go up to bed, he will follow and sleep in the crook of my arm. He's the best puppy I've ever had...besides Tiger.

Hope all is well in blog world. I've been keeping up.

2006-08-24T22:58:00.000-05:00

Hopefully, I won't wretch until tomorrow afternoon.

In their eyes there's something lacking, what they need's a damn good whacking

2006-08-14T01:24:00.000-05:00

Several weeks ago I received a bulletin on MySpace that infuriated me. It was labeled something to the affect of "on my soapbox...the hard truth" and its basic premise was information to disuade pork consumption.

Fine. Sure. You're a vegetarian. You can't stomach the thought of eating flesh, its for personal health purposes, the US overproduces and overconsumes meat- Yeah. I buy it. Bravo. You're a rational adult with good reasons for your behavior. It even sounds like you may have done some research. You have my seal of approval.

On the other hand, there are those peddling a bunch of unresearched, ignorant, high-and-mighty bullshit and frankly its irritating. Being opinionated is easy. I do it all day every day. Actually taking the time to research and found those opinions is not as easy.

The first thing that really bothered me about this bulletin is that its an article from a website disguised as personal opinion and doesn't seem to have many accounted sources. It throws around statistics and sprinkles in "PETA tv" of extreme cases. Its like reading government propaganda, but poorly outlined.

This is the subhead that made me hit the roof.

"Farming Family Values":
Factory farms are pure hell for pigs and their babies. Mother pigs spend most of their lives in tiny “gestation” crates, which are so small that the animals are unable to turn around or even lie down comfortably. They are repeatedly impregnated until they are slaughtered. Piglets, who are taken away from their distraught mothers after just a few weeks, have their tails chopped off, their teeth are clipped off with pliers, and the males are castrated—all without painkillers. Learn more about cruelty to pigs.

This struck a rather personal note and this is me blowing a gasket. Where the FUCK do you get your information? Have you ever been on a pig farm? Have you ever had shit on your boots? This is me raising my hand. Unfortunalty, there are always people who abuse the system. However, this is not the norm and stop insinuating it is. One husband beats his wife. Does that mean every husband beats his wife? I grew up in the midwest where "Farming Family Values" means taking pride in your animals and quality products. My family has been on the same land for five generations through hard work and ethical practice. Step out of your metro-suburban yuppy-ism and stop wielding terms you do not understand.

While not explicitly stated, I gather the purpose of this article and website is to ultimately stop the slaughter and consumption of livestock. Everybody has goals, but this is impossible. Sorry you starry-eyed optomists.

Why not devote your energy toward something feesible? Why not support organic and family farming? Instead of trying to convince people not to eat meat, redirect your efforts toward encouraging the consumption of free range and hormone free meat.

Do you buy milk at the supermarket? It has chemicals in it, too. So does the cheese, yogurt, eggs, produce...it goes on. Its not just the meat.

Support your local farmers market. Shit. You'd be putting money back into your community instead of feeding a conglomerate AND you would get better quality products.

You want to make a difference? Quit wasting your time AND mine.

***this post was not directed at the individual, but the community at large.

A friend of the devil is a friend of mine

2006-07-21T14:17:00.000-05:00

My car went bye-bye. I even traded it for a '94 Toyota 4runner. Its had major work put into it, but has a lot of miles. Its been a while since I had a truck...and I'm kind of enjoying it. Although, I am not going to enjoy the gas that will go into it. Do you like the cattle catcher?

I felt my interview went very well. They hoped to make a decision by the end of this week, but I still haven't heard from them. Its the same company Adam works for, so I used him as a reference. The only bad thing is its part-time. I'm very tired of waiting tables for my livelihood. I don't enjoy it, but its the best money per hour for any job I've ever worked. What a shame...

Upcoming fun...
- Boone Co. Fair on Sunday. Yay! Corndogs!
- July 30: Demo Derby. Yay! Crunching cars!
- Aug. 6: Liam's birthday! Yay! Cake!
- Aug. 18: Big and Rich! Yay! Red cowboy hat!
- Sept. 2: AM's wedding! Yay! Cake, again!

And that's my excitement.

Sweet like a kiss, sharp like a razorblade

2006-07-18T22:10:00.000-05:00

Say your prayers. I have an interview tomorrow for an internship. This would get my foot in the door to network and freshen up my resume.

It looks like I am saying goodbye to my beloved car, wimpy though it is. The rack is leaking, the rear main seal is leaking worse, and the rearend is going. :( When I come home next, it will be in a different vehicle...or on the motorcycle. We'll see.

I bought a dress pattern for AM's wedding. While sifting through the patterns, I decided I am going to try to make the majority of my clothes. The patterns keep getting cuter and they do a very good job of keeping up with current fashion.
No longer are homemade clothes supposed to make you feel frumpy and prudish. My clothes won't necessarily be less expensive, but they will be exactly what I want.

If you're the death of me darling, I wanna die

2006-07-16T23:26:00.000-05:00

Not a very exciting weekend.

I worked Saturday lunch. I went back at dinner and realized I had already worked 37.35 hours. I brought it to the managers attention and he FREAKED. So I got to work in the kitchen for two hours and go home. It was kind of fun not worrying about customers and mock yelling back and forth with my Tio.

I went to my house, changed and went to Gus' for dinner with Liam. I had tasty spanakopita and veggies and baklava for dinner. Its not nearly as good as Chicago Style's, though.

When we were getting ready to leave, Liam pulled out of our parking spot first and headed to the alley. I was taking my time and a guy jetted from the door and ran right past me with employees trailing. Liam saw this, jumped off his motorcycle and chased the guy for about a mile through the ghetto, backyards, under clotheslines, etc. In the end, he lost the guy (who was much smaller)and the police couldn't find him, even with a canine unit. However, its the most police I've seen come running with the tires squealing for $20 in tip money. He's a little bit of a hero and Gus owes him a meal.

Today, I bought a grater and hand mixer and made carrot cake from scratch. Thanks for the recipe, Rach. I burned out the motor on the mixer making the cream cheese frosting, though. I made the boys one and took half of another to Bruce and the other have to Brian. Its kind of fun having lots of people to bake for who appreciate it.

Tomorrow morning, work as usual. I have started to get peeved with others that think "bartending" at the Olive Garden makes you cool. "Oh, I'm a BARTENDER..." Yeah, no you're not. You know how to use an Island Oasis machine, you make chocolate milk for kids and you think 3/4 of a shot of vermouth is correct for a martini. Bartending at a chain restaurant is not bartending. Get over yourselves.

Baby bring me down

2006-07-13T12:58:00.000-05:00

Shoot me so I can go to heaven.

Yesterday was supposed to be my day off, but I picked up a shift. It was the worst day I've ever had at the OG. I f-ed up something so badly with the new computers the corporate help desk couldn't figure it out. Apparently, a computer programmer is going to fix the whole system because I found some loophole.

Did you expect less?

I fell for you like a child

2006-07-11T12:02:00.000-05:00

Per Megan's suggestion:

A Girl Named Zippy by Haven Kimmel:
Obviously an easy read- it only took me a day. I related as she used many analogies I would have come up with; most of them were over-the-top. We all know how I am. I also understood her perpetual scabby knees and urge to not wear shoes.

Back making the rounds at all our haunts, honky tonks, restaurants

2006-07-10T12:00:00.000-05:00

Cross your fingers... I applied for a job and it looks VERY good. They should hire me.

I made it to work at 10:00 am sharp. I looked at my schedule before I hopped out of the car. I really have to be there at 5:00 pm. I'm in the habit of bartending Monday mornings and didn't even look beforehand. Oh well, it got me up and going. Except now we can't have dinner together tonight. That fresh beef roast was going to be tasty. Thanks, Shannon's mom.

My bathroom sink drain is leaking and the water, when on full blast only trickles. Hopefully they fix that today.

My tomato plant keeps producing. However, I think I stunted their size from planting in a too-small pot. Liam says they have super taste, though. I don't like tomatoes. He used my first jalapeno in pasta last night and it was tasty.

So many birthdays this month- Meg, Brian, Grandma and AT. Am I missing anyone?

Happy Monday!

I hear you call my name and it feels like home

2006-07-08T21:39:00.000-05:00

Rode to McBaine, again. It was easier this time.

On an aside, are you all saying McBaine in your head like they do on the Simpsons? I certainly hope so.

I'm too lazy to think of a song quote.

2006-07-07T15:58:00.000-05:00

Elliott took me on my first real trail ride in Cosmo Park. It was really hard to not fall off and not run into trees. However, it was probably the most fun I've had riding. I had to pay attention to what I was doing. It wasn't just about strength and endurance (both of which I am working on).

...And now I'm eating mint chocolate chip ice cream. Num.

I want to ride my..

2006-07-07T12:58:00.000-05:00

BICYCLE! Adam and I rode almost 20 miles last night. My muscles aren't sore, but my ass sure hurts.

We went to McBaine.

Paperback writer

2006-07-06T16:06:00.000-05:00

I forgot that I was going to start blogging the books I read. Here's the update.

The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd
Character development was really good, but I found the story a little predictable. It was kind of comforting...like eating a piece of chocolate.

Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden
I like historically fiction and fell in love with this book. The detail was out of this world. No, I have not seen the movie.

Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim by David Sedaris
I feel guilty this is the only book of his I have read to date. I will seek out the others, as his fluid storytelling makes me feel more at home with my crazy family.

God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian by Kurt Vonegut
Literally, out of this world. Quick, easy, dark read. I highly recommend.

Slaughter House Five by Kurt Vonegut
I was not forced to read this in high school, and maybe that's why I enjoyed it. Again, historical. Vonegut is quickly becoming my favorite.

Meliss- any suggestions?

I'm a real live wire

2006-07-06T12:23:00.000-05:00

We made it through vacation, but just barely.

The flight to Philly was long with one layover and circling over Akron. Liam's brother, Casey, and his buddy picked us up. We waited over an hour in the airport parking lot because only two toll boothes were open. Of course, they charged us for the time we spent sitting in the car waiting in line.

The next day, all 11 of us piled in cars and headed to the Pocono Mountains. It began to rain. There was taffic on 476 so we detoured through the country. I wasn't keeping close track, but I think it took four hours. The reason I didn't keep track is I have 1/8 the size of a normal bladder. Through being obsessive or something, I was afraid if I was too aware of how long the trip too, my bladder would become hyperactive in retaliation. At any rate, I made it without a potty break. This is earth-shattering as I normally take two pit stops in the three hours between Columbia and Springfield.
Upon arrival I met approximately a shit-ton of people and tried to remember all of their names. There are 59 cousins on this side of the family. I'm not kidding about the shit-ton. Liam's grandmother, Honey, rents out almost an entire resort with cabins, a lodge, pool, arcade, playground, etc. We stayed in the lodge where our beds were in the loft with 20 of our closest cousins.

By day three, it was still raining and I began to have tummy pains. Oh, that's right. I chucked for the next 24 hours, had hot and cold flashes, super achy muscles and really just wanted my own bed.

Day five the rain stopped. Most of Pennsylvania received 12 inches in four days. I was over my stomach bug and decided to lay by the pool. I put on SPF 15. It didn't help. Currently, I itch in a band across my stomach, boobs and the tops of my legs because I am peeling. I roasted. Why is it every summer I get big balls and think, "This year will be different"?

Never have I met a family that takes drinking games so seriously. I am close in age to the oldest cousin and God knows I have done my liver some damage. Lately, I haven't been in a hardcore drinking mood. That was part of a lifestyle I left behind. They were actually a little bent out of shape I wouldn't participate. I told them rolling dice distracted me from my beer. The first night six of them drank 60 beers in one hour. They save beer tabs and had two red plastic cups full at the end of the week, which they donate to kids on dialysis. Is this the rationalization behind not buying kegs?

Did I mention it started raining, again? We packed up the cars, went back to Philadelphia for the night and got to the airport at 6 am the next morning. Our flight was at seven, the airport is rather small for a large city- I figured this would be enough time. Negative. We stood in line to print our boarding passes and check our luggage. To my dismay, the line for security was eight city blocks long. Fifteen minutes before our flight, airline folk hussled people with flights before 7:10 into a separate line. Half the original line stepped over. The very short, paunchy man shuffling belongings through the x-ray machine was bitching about how people should get there early. I told him I wasn't going to arrive three hours before my flight just to make it through security. Liam forgot to check his pocket knife and threw it in the tub with his keys and phone. One gentleman politely told him they would confiscate it. Previous paunchy man came over to yell at him for committing a federal offense. The whole time our plane is basically backing away from the gate. We barely made it ontime.

When we made our connecting flight in Memphis, a NWA guy was snippy with me about boarding. The bathroom on this plane was out of order, which is a problem with the affore mentioned bladder issue. NWA can kiss my white ass. I think I would drive before flying with them again.

We got the car out of hock in STL, stopped for White Castle in Wentzville and napped into the evening. The concensus was vacation was NOT relaxing and work seemed a better alternative.

I missed the cat, too.

Well, now that's out of my system...

In the past few weeks we went to see Cars and Superman. I gotta admit, I liked Cars better. Superman was ok, but I felt the different story lines were a little disjointed. Lois Lane wasn't that ballsy, infact she was constantly falling all over herself. I don't feel it lived up to its hype.

Yesterday, Liam did an oil change on my motorcycle and car. I am very thankful. He tells me an oil change on momo would run about $60. He taught me so I can do it next time.

MU emailed me to say I was not in their first round of candidates selected to interview for the Res Hall Coordinator position. So, I started unpacking my apartment. Its cozy and I still need to figure out what to do about the lack of storage in my kitchen.

Business at the OG is slowing down, so I am devising a game plan. They only had me on the schedule four days this week and everyone is frantically trying to pick up hours.

Other than that, same ol' shit just another day.

I've seen a million faces and I've rocked them all.

2006-06-20T17:29:00.000-05:00

I think I know why I love this cat so much...He's cuddling in my lap and looking at me with love and adoration. He doesn't care that I am falling asleep and completely bitchy today. All he cares about is that I continue petting and have an body temp close to 100 degrees.

Three days until vacation. Hot damn.

Forgot one thing...

2006-06-18T00:43:00.000-05:00

Can you say...pink motorcycle :)

Lock it up now

2006-06-17T14:21:00.000-05:00

I keep meaning to blog and then I'm tired when I get home from work. I have a few minutes between shifts; savor it.

Shannon and I moved out of our cutie patootie house, and I moved into a tiny apartment. I have the upstairs of a little bungalo downtown. My rent is cheap and my utilities should be minimal. I might be able to afford cable for the first time since I lived in the dorms.

Searching for the apartment was a bitch. Most things in my price range were crapholes, and I cannot bring myself to live in a complex. They don't have character. What I've traded for parallel monotony, I've gained in slanted eave space and steep, narrow stairs over two gay men who water my plants.

I gave two cheap pieces of furniture to Goodwill because they wouldn't go up the stairs. We lost my futon matress, not once, but twice off the trailer. The first time it left my underwear drawer flapping in the wind. We didn't notice until we reached the destination. My panties were caught in the box springs of my bed and one of my sports bras was abandoned in the middle of a busy thorofare.

Tricia and I went to drag night at Soco Thursday. The bar was busy and I got my drink discount. I've made an observation: men like breasts, gay or straight. The only difference is gay men have no qualms with outright fondling while straight men pretend to "accidentally" run into them.

We leave for vacation early Friday from St. Louis. I have not had a vacation since February of last year. I cannot wait to not be at work.

I had a phone interview on Wednesday with Residential Life at Mizzou. I might be a res hall coordinator. We'll see.

Apparently, we have a stalker at work. He has said some aggressive things to one waitress and one hostess. I am internet researching for a picture. Again, glad I bought the shotgun.

I am currently watching the cat "stalk" Adam's pet snake. Its funny to watch a little fuzz hunt something that is contained. His ears are splayed out as if to remain inconspicous, and he raises his paw to bat every now-and-then, but decides not to swat. Frankly, I hate snakes. They give me the heebee jeebees.

That's all I got. Hope everybody has a good weekend.

2006-05-21T01:37:00.000-05:00

Two things...

Some people couldn't view the link...a Mossberg 500 is a shotgun. There's a good song about these...

And

Mom's birthday was the 16th! Happy Birthday, Mommy! I think I have an embarassing (or flattering) photo somewhere. We'll see what I can come up with.

I remember running through the wet grass, fallling a step behind/both of us never tiring

2006-05-20T00:07:00.000-05:00

Man, I am getting bad about not updating.

Jake took a job in Knoxville, Tenn. Congrats to him- he leaves in a week or so to apartment hunt.

Congrats to my lil sis, Rachel, on her ACT score of 34! Nock 'em dead on your tour of MIT this summer!

Shannon is going to Barcelona instead of chiropractic school in a month. She will teach English and run amuck in Spain. This leaves me with a housing delimna- I love my little place, but can't afford it on my own, and I don't have anyone to live with
me. It looks as though I will move AGAIN. I think I shall try to pair down my expenses, maybe move somewhere within biking distance of work, etc. We'll see. I'll keep you updated on address changes.

We went to Bruce's a couple of nights ago. Bruce is my folks age, single, a mechanic. He lives with his best friend, Hippie- the same age, a retired mechanic and Vietnam vet. They are an interesting pair. Hippie is on dialysis, is affected by Agent Orange, has arthritis and says he has died eight times. However, he had a heart transplant 14 years ago and, therefore, says he has nine additional lives.

While Bruce, Adam and Liam worked on some project, Hippie and I watched Gone with the Wind on the projection tv, ate junk food and he self-medicated his "arthritis" hourly.

He told me about his last stint in the hospital and how sometimes he gets down about his ailments. Except once he watched a show about siamese twins that played baseball and argued with each other and went to school and tried to be normal. Now when he feels bad about his situation, he says, "I can do it if they can do it."

....It mad me think.

I had forgotten what Columbia is like in the summer. Graduation was last weekend, and the town has emptied, including my restaurant. I might have some other irons in the fire.

Liam is now bouncing at Soco a couple weekend nights. A friend and I visited for "The Show" last night. What fun. I get a 25% discount on my tab and they have....drumroll...jello shot! We have an extrodinary time. Its been years since I was last there.

Hope all is well in the Patch. Miss you all.

Sorry for spelling/grammar errors. I am too tired and lazy to check and/or correct.

Change my picture

2006-04-29T20:29:00.000-05:00

....

I bought a Mossberg 500. And my shoulder hurts.

....

Went for sushi tonight. I ate the fake stuff and drank saki. It rocked.

....

What a beautiful wreck you are

2006-04-24T20:39:00.000-05:00

Sorry I dissapeared from blog world. Nothing exciting has happened- promise.

We have started a new habit here. When the weather predicts hail, we all park our cars in the covered garage downtown and meet at Jimmy Johns for dinner. We eat on the sidewalk and watch the storm roll in. Its kind of fun.

This weekend we went to Legends to see Sam's band. They are an awesome rock cover band with really good originals. I shopped at Kohl's for a few summer things and we went to the shooting range at Finger Lakes. I got some sun and had fun shooting the artillery. I am getting better! I am looking into buying a shotgun.

This week will be super busy at work. I picked up a few bartending shifts. Thursday I am behind the bar from 10-10. Yeehaw.

Wednesday the car gets new wheel bearings. Its confused with its Missouri plates and inspection sticker.

Our yard is growing into a jungle state. I have been on the lookout for a used mower. Cross your fingers. ...Maybe I'll just get a goat. I planted a tomato, jalapeno and a purple pepper. They are doing well and it gives me something to fawn over. :) We also have a possum and ticks. goo.

It looks like Shannon is probably not going to school in Portland anymore. Her friend Katie lives in Spain and teaches English. Shannon is most likely going to do the same thing. Its exciting, because she will be happy and I will have an excuse to use my passport.

June 23-July 2 I am going on vacation with Liam's family in the Pokano (sp?) Mountains in Pennsylvania. His grandmother takes the extended family and they stay in cabins and do all sorts of random day trips. It will be very very nice to get away for a bit.

Aunt Molly and Kevin decided to get married this summer! Yay for one hellava party!

Shoo- we DO need to schedule some drinking time.

Meliss- I am so excited for you! I love reading your poems!

I know its strictly taboo

2006-03-21T15:46:00.000-06:00

What's the definition of the 3-16? Its my birthday and the formula for every rap song that you sing.

2006-03-21T15:32:00.000-06:00

I had a pretty good birthday. I redeemed my coupon from Valentine's Day and got my massage and pedicure. A first on both accounts. The guy that worked on my feet is known about town as the Pedicure King. An independent film is being made about him. For $30 I got on hour and a half of massaging, avacado mud mask, hot paraffin (I may have misspelled) wax dip and hot pink paint job. It was fantastic.

I went home to find Sarah on my doorstep. We ran around town a little. I bought myself a malachite ring at Cool Stuff.

We met Jake, Shannon, Brian, Adam, and Elliot at Flat Branch for dinner and drinks. All -in-all, it was a good night.

On St. Patricks Day, Jake and I had a reuben for lunch and hit McNally's for a Guiness. We tried a new little bar that night called Snappers. They are home of the $1 High Life, Stag and PBR. Its kind of a hole in the wall, and I like it. We stood in line at McNally's for a bit and then headed to Tellers for martinis. It paled in comparison to St. Patty's of the past. Oh well.

Hope everyone at home had a rockin' good time.

It was always burning since the worlds been turning

2006-03-19T19:01:00.000-06:00

I was undergrad at the same this guy was starting his masters. Awesome!

We just stood there getting wet with our back against the fence

2006-03-15T00:14:00.000-06:00

A short update: Everyone in Missouri is in one piece (barely).

I was at The Boys' House when the hail started. We only got one round and then wind. We have no hail damage on our cars. Luckily, I was not at work (about one mile north). Windshields broken and paint f-ed up by baseball sized hail.

In towns 10-20 miles north, several people are dead from tornados. I lucked out and we are safe and sound.

Glad to hear everyone in Springfield is ok. Mom is the only person I have yet to hear from. Please call?

Placticine porters

2006-03-09T23:41:00.000-06:00

What Beatles song personality are you? Take Two

John and Yoko

You're both of them--at once. You might want to get that checked out. Er.. hair peace! Yeah!

Click Here to Take This Quiz
Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

I'm just sitting here thinking, drinking 'bout you.

2006-03-09T23:20:00.000-06:00

Big and Rich at the state fair. The red cowboy hat should be out in full force.

I had dreams, they were clouds in my coffee

2006-03-09T23:17:00.000-06:00

Sarah is coming to visit next week. It should be fun.

Work sucked tonight. My favorite employee said "YOU'RE training to bartend?" She f-ing sucks and is really going to hate working with me after I get my feet wet. Bitch.

Weather is getting warmer, but it always snows on my birthday. I guess we'll see.

Blue banana tied up in her hair, just sitting there singing every song on the radio

2006-03-07T23:40:00.000-06:00

Dude.

Window motor is FINALLY finished. Who knew they were next to impossible to do in my car...even for two professionals.

Need to call mom tomorrow.

Wearing a smile that she keeps in a jar by the door, who is it for

2006-03-05T22:29:00.000-06:00

Weird stuff around here. This happened at the dorm next to Jones where I lived my freshman year. Even more strange is the facebook account.

Today was my day off. I helped change Adam's oil (put the oil pan bolt back and swapped the filter). In the process my temple met the jack handle and I saw stars. Also, I cleaned the interior of my car and Liam is replacing my driver side window motor as I speak. It started dying last summer, and the weather has been so nice I finally sprung the $50 to pay for the motor. I want to be able to take out my WT-tops when the weather is good.

I ate like crap today and I am feeling it-pizza hut, McDonald's, AND chocolate chip pancakes ala Jake.

The cat didn't come back the very next day....or the next. So I went with Liam to the humane society and he picked out a new little buddy. His name is Habib and looks like he is wearing a tuxedo (all black with white paws, tummy, chin and whiskers). He has on meds for his "shelter sneeze" and he was dewormed cause he had a tape. He is snuggly and nice and I love him.

I am training to bartend at the OG sometime this week I believe. It should be good times. I think I will be ok at it. The other day, one of the bartenders asked me what was in Kettle on the rocks. :)

It looks like the lil sis(') might come visit in the near future. It'll be fun and a nice change of pace.

AND I find this interesting on a dorky photog level.

Goodnight all.

God help the mister who comes between me and my sister...

2006-03-04T12:06:00.000-06:00

Ireland, circa 2000.

So much heaven, I know I'm going to hell

2006-03-03T13:40:00.000-06:00

Nothing too exciting is happening in Missouri, y'all. *cringe*

Dad drove through to pick a sprayer up in Kansas City, so we picked him up at the truckstop and brought him in to town for some grub. Yay Fazoli's (read: YUCK).

I've been walking in the mornings on the MKT Trail. Shooey, this might be up your alley...it would be something you could train for, as the trail goes all the way across my great state. Tuesday, I walked/ran six miles. Today I did nine. My inner thighs and obliques are doing that satisfying "I got off my ass and did something" hurt. Grrr! Feel the burn!

Work is good. I am making ok money and I really like most of my coworkers. There is only one girl I want to hit in the teeth. I might be looking at a promo to bartender, too.

It seems that real job oportunities are beginning to pop up. Cross your fingers.

With that orange oil rag she wiped it clean, its guaranteed to get repeated in my dreams

2006-02-17T14:24:00.000-06:00

Its my day off and I'm sick.

I started feeling achy Tuesday night and went to bed early. Then, my lungs filled with grossness, the pressure in my head increased to near fatal proportions and my nose started running.

I have to sleep on the couch, propped up. If I don't, I have terrible dreams about drowing because in real life I can't breath.

After my shower today, I found some 24-hour allergy medicine I had stashed, and now I know why it wasn't used.

I'm stoned out of my mind.

Today was supposed to be tax day. The forms are prepared. All that I had to do was go to kinkos and go to the post office. Two hours after starting this project, one trip to kinkos, two trips to the boys' house and a trip to Hyvee, I have one Gatorade, two corndogs, a stapler and staples, copies and manilla envelopes. The one thing I'm missing: copies of the backside of my percentage income for Missouri.

*Even in my altered state of mind it bothers me that I used above semicolon incorrectly. However, I am too apathetic to reconstruct my sentence structure*

I forfeit.

I think I'll stare at the wall for an hour.

Hope you enjoyed it.

His rival it seems had broken his dreams by steeling the girl of his fancy

2006-02-12T20:19:00.000-06:00

Hey, I am really bad at this blogging...thing. I swear, I check everyone else's on a regular basis.

What's new:

Shannon started working at the OG with me. Its fun that we have some work friends in common. She took Indi and me to her parents a few days ago. While there, we ate home-grown roast beef, frolicked with the future roast beef and petted the kitties.

Friday night I was in a fashion show. A wife of a friend of a friend is starting a new business and had a "coming out" of sorts at Shattered to get her name out there. Ladies, I will link it as soon as her webpage is up and going. Contrary to popular belief, these are not comfortable. However, they do make your legs look long(er) and they do make your ass hurt after three hours of dancing (not THAT kind) and strutting your stuff.

Spork the cat went missing about a week ago. We have been to the humane society and Adam posted photos in the neighborhood. I hope he just found a better gig.

Phoenix the cat has taken to licking the bathtub facet and ducking under running water during/after my showers. I can't figure out if this is a nod to my exemplery hiegene or she is really a mermaid. If anything, she is definitely weird.

Work has been busy and boring.

My sisters turned 19 and 17 on January 31 and February 6 respectively. It means I'll be older soon, too. Every year I realize I am collapsing more and more into my "adult" years and I dig my fingernails in, grit my teeth and scream it off as best as possible. Unfortunately, I still turn a year older. *sigh*

AM is putting her house on the market and might still be looking for a temporary home for Puptizle Sassy. If anyone would like a fuzzball in their home for a month or so, give me a call.

Hope all is well in blog land. Keep posting so I can keep up on the gossip.

We are all prisoners of our own device

2006-01-24T13:15:00.000-06:00

Shannon's party was a success. The only downfall was the snow. We made the best of it, as it kept the keg cool and the ground hard for wrasslin'. Things that added to the atmosphere :cowboy hats, our tire swing (rated for 140 miles per hour), cigarette hotboxing our smoking lounge (read: lean-to),Liam in a jean skirt, Jake drinking martinis out of my half-a-bottle wine glasses and people hanging out in our cellar. Why the cellar? Good question. I should have pictures to post soon.

Other than that, there has been a lot of working going on and a little bit-o-fun. I am trying to FINALLY get on the normal human sleep schedule. I went to bed at 2:00 a.m. and got up at 7:00 a.m. The day has been productive thus far. Its amazing how long my internal clock has been skewed. Ultimatly, I have Brown's to thank and the accomplices that spent their time much the same way I did. While not a complaint, it is interesting that I have been fairly nocturnal for almost two years because of one split second decision.

Huh.

Hope all is well in blog world. I've been keeping up with all of you. Somebody toast me with a shot of Jack. *clink*

Whatever makes you happy, whatever you want.

2006-01-12T00:22:00.000-06:00

Things are good.

Birthdays are rolling 'round and I am getting sentimental.

I love my Shanooonnnnaaaaoonn.She's the best.

Anchor on the line of a clock that tells the time that is running out on you

2006-01-05T13:41:00.000-06:00

Its been awhile. Sorry.

Meg and Brain's wedding was fantastic. Some of the highlights were Stephanie falling down the stairs at Brinkerhoff; the dress being late (yes, through personification, it sounds as though it got itself stuck in traffic); I broke out in hives; almost got Brian's ring stuck on MY finger; Meg spilled her cocktail down the front of my dress; said cocktail turned my feet bright pink because my shoes were dyed; felt like a cutie in my little fur and black gloves; fun hanging out after the wedding; exhibited self control.

Sorry folks. Its been a couple of weeks, and the memories are a little fuzzy.

Christmas involved making out like a present bandit (thanks, mom); year number two at Third Base under very different circumstances; hanging out with Awesome Cousin; seeing all the cool kids in Springfield.

I worked at the OG on New Years Eve. Afterward, I met everyone at Brian's were we watched South Park and the champagne popped its own cork at midnight because we weren't paying attention. We watched First Night fireworks from his couch. Its been an interesting year. Life has certainly changed rapidly...or is it me making rapid changes?

Shannon and I are loving our country home. It is peaceful and cozy. We turn the stereo up because we can. I still don't feel completely moved in because there are boxes unpacked, but we finally put up my artwork in the living room and hung other decorations. It feels like home. We are planning our first big party this month for the redhead's birthday. Anyone want to come?

The boys bought clay pigeons and have been out shooting a couple of times. Apparently, I am acquiring a shot gun- for protection and getting those waskly pigeons.

Our landlord is great. He dropped off our washer and dryer which was met with a two-girl happy dance as soon as he left. We asked which trash company to call-the trash has taken over our "smoking lounge" (Read: lean-to). He waved his hand and said it was silly to spend $200 a year on garbage. We leave it at the end of the drive and he picks it up and throws it in his Dumpster at work. What a guy!

My guy at the Missouri extension emailed me and said I was still in the running for the advanced photo job, which is good news. I had pretty much tossed in the towel. I guess this also means the writing job is still in existence, too.

Monday night has become my evening to go out. McNally's (the bar where I imbibied waaaay under age, where the rugby team gathered, and where I spent my 19th and 20th birthday with MY MOM) has $1 pints of Killian's on Mondays. I usually meet people from work and Shannon. Its always busy and when Flogging Molly comes on the jukebox, everyone grabs there neighbor, they sway together, spill a little beer and sing at the top of their lungs. Love it.

Things are looking up. The bills are getting paid off. I am finding my "places". I still miss home, but circumstances have changed. Its not the same. I guess its a good lesson to get the most enjoyment at the time, because everything changes and nothing is forever.

Take care, everybody.

Baby you can drive my car and maybe I love you

2005-12-12T00:56:00.000-06:00

The new house is great...when there is no snow. Camaro plus snow plus gravel equals bad:

5000 S. Brushwood Lake
Columbia, MO 65203

Browns on Thursday night. Rally the troops. I wanna see all yo' mugs there.

Meg's wedding on Sat. Surreal. Good news is the dress still fits.

Worked from 3-7 yesterday and a split shift today. My dogs are barking.

They all think their going far

2005-12-04T12:24:00.000-06:00

Last night was teriaki chicken on rice, greek salad complete with feta and German chocolate cake.

What made my day: Evan Williams egg nog. I love that stuff. The downside is the more you drink, the less whiskey you taste :(

It was a nice night in.

Adam made eggs, bacon and grits this morning, so it has been a 12-hour eat-a-thon.

I washed breakfast down with some cake.

I interviewed for ANOTHER position at David's bridal. This time it is for management. It would be good pay and good hours. We'll see.

Shannon and I are finalizing lease stuff. We are supposed to meet with the landlord today, so I will find out soon when we can move.

I am on the hunt for a piece of marble so I can make peanut brittle. Yum. Christmas good.

I wish I was special/You're so f@#$ special....

2005-12-02T08:02:00.000-06:00

State Farm paid me for the rather small scratch on my front bumper and now I can afford a place to live.

Shannon's roommate setup is less than stellar, so she is moving out. We have been on the hunt for a roof over the head for the last few days...and found a jem. We'll move early in the week.

Its a smallish two bedroom with a large eat in kitchen with bay windows (read: Shannon is going to cook for me and I'll have lots-o-room to bake!), pets are allowed for the kitty's sake, washer and dryer and all the rest of the appliances.

Here's the kicker...we live a mile and a half off the beaten path in the country! We have three acres with a creek, propane heat and well water. I'm in love. On our way out to look at it, we kept looking at each other and grinning, because it makes us feel at home.

Our landlord is about 25 years old and stammered and grinned when I asked if we could pay our deposit incrimentally if I payed interest in baked goods.

Our back yard is a pretty decent hill for sledding.

There are cows in the pasture across the road.

It will be our sanctuary...and great party place. I cannot wait.

I'll post pictures soon.

Right round like a record

2005-11-27T02:41:00.000-06:00

Eddie Murphy.

One pound nacho cheese.

Two bottles dry red wine.

A fine night.

2005-11-26T12:13:00.000-06:00

I thought this might stir some shit up one way or another. At any rate, Brian is very talented.

Nothing too exciting here. Meg's bachelorette party is in STL this weekend. It'll be nice to get out of town for some rowdiness.

I like to be rowdy.

You move me

2005-11-25T15:48:00.000-06:00

I am thankful for...

-A full tummy
-A drive in the country
-Whiskey
-My family
-Friends
-Being a tough broad
-My distinguished silver
-Heat
-Clothes
-Sparkles
-Tiger
-Momocycles
-Black mascara
-Fast cars
-Men who know how to drive em
-Men who let me drive them
-Nag champa
-White musk
-Thick hair ties
-High heels
-Hoodie sweatshirts
-Horseshoes
-Cozy dog
-Slippers
-Cross stitch
-Loud purses
-Regaining health
-Nyquil
-Toothbrushes
-Being outspoken
-Being a good shot

Happy Halloween

2005-11-23T16:31:00.000-06:00

What I helped do the day before Halloween.

In reference to comments....

2005-11-23T15:41:00.000-06:00

Tattoos and piercings are oh so tempting. A little too addictive. Dangerously so.

The hair, I'm not sure about. It was said in anger as I was wrestling with it this morning. One man once told me it was going to strangle him in his sleep.

Shoo has momentary lapses in judgement. Fat Tire is overrated bullshit. Its drinkable, but nothing special, just hard to find in Illinois. Go to Friar Tucks and try some Boulevard Wheat. Then, we'll talk. Beer needs balls. Guiness is good for you.

Lori, I love you, too.

I am bling bling.

Know what pisses me off?

2005-11-23T10:25:00.000-06:00

1) I had to buy Fat Tire at McNally's last night because it was cheaper. Inherently, in an Irish pub, Guiness should always be the more affordable choice. It also bothers me that I had to ask about the special because I have no money. I always made fun of those people. The only difference between them and me is that I still tipped the waitress. Well.

2) Big and Rich were in Jeff City yesterday signing CD's at SuperWalmart. I had to work all day and didn't have money for gas even if I didn't. Garr.

3) My hair. I'm thinking about cutting it.

Yuck. Fat Tire

Won't call you baby like I did before

2005-11-21T13:20:00.000-06:00

Mucas update: the tide is dissipating. Praise the Lord.

The bad news: I am making bubciss for money at the OG.

The good news: I might have something else brewing. I am not counting my chickens until they hatch, though. Look where that got me. Yeah. Great.

Events: Meg's wedding in less than a month. I should be in town Dec. 15. Someone want to get me drunk? Please?

Missing the fun: I'm sorry I'm not there.

Leave me where I am/ I'm only sleeping

2005-11-18T16:03:00.000-06:00

Don't you hate feeling a certain way without entitlement?

Hung out with Shannon last night for a bit. I love our "coffee talk". I popped into the Blue Fugue (aka. Music Cafe) because the Station was playing. It was funny, because they all said hi matter-of-factly and then realized I was in the wrong state. It was good to see some familiar faces.

Thanks for the words of advice pertaining to my current mucas abundance. You're dolls. I am on Walmart brand benedryl. I think my tables at lunch thought I was drunk. Let's just say, I shouldn't be operating heavy machinery. Damn. My crane will have stay parked in the drive.

Missing home a lot. I am just now realizing that I left a really fun life for a really not so fun one. Its all for the best. Its all for the best. I am so very sad I will miss busy week at the bar.

Interviewed at First National today. It seemed to go ok except for my sniffles. I politely told the lovely ladies who questioned me that shaking hands might lead to the shake of death. They found it humerous. I should hear back from them a week from Monday or so.

I'm working a spit shift today :P I have to go back at 5:00. They only kept me for an hour and a half at lunch. I am making good money hourly, but I am not putting in enough hours.

Irrelevent question: Where has the past nine months gone? It kind of feels like I drifted off into a gentle sleep and was jerked awake by cold, bony hands.

Spork is sitting in my lap trying to rub his face on mine.

Points if you can name the artist and album of the song in my title. No lyric searches for you!

Summer has come and past, the innocent can never last

2005-11-17T14:32:00.000-06:00

Sorry for the change. I am feeling a bit waspy today.

This waitressing gig is not as lucrative as I thought it might be. I did pick up a shift today, so hopefully I won't be in the part of the crew that gets shut down after the rush. I need some dough.

Tomorrow I have an interview at First National Bank.

Yes, I know. I said that when I had the luxury of money in the bank. I do understand the hypocrisy and I am trying to deal with it on a personal level. You know how I am. Still, it probably wasn't an excuse to say it. Sorry.

Burned the shit out of my hand yesterday. I put a metal handled pot on the back burner, but turned on the front burner. When I realized it and picked up the pot, the handle had been over the front burner for twenty minutes.

I have a cold. The boys have been passing it about. I stumbled getting out of bed this morning- my equilibrium is shot. Elliot saw and I explained it was strictly from the shift in mucas in my sinuses.

I am currently eating chocolate pudding and tator tots. Not mixed, but next to each other. I have concluded the reason I am not gaining weight, is the lack of alcohol (boo) and horseshoes (boo as well). Someone send me a D'arcy's vibe, say around 6:00 pm?

Sound good?

I thought so.

Bobby thumbed a diesel down that rode us all the way to New Orleans

2005-11-15T02:29:00.000-06:00

The benefit to Missouri, you might ask?

Mwahahaha. Anyone want to drop by and fill up?

Jojo left his home in Tuscon, Arizona/ bought some California grass

2005-11-14T15:53:00.000-06:00

My sister has reminded me how much I miss my Saturday/Sunday morning (Read: mid-afternoon) eat-a-thons at Buffet City. Good food and good company.

The highlight of my day has been watching Ellen. Today was Paul McCartney. I love me some former Beatles. What I've heard of the new album sounds great. I wasn't a huge Wings fan, but this seems promising. Also, he has written a book. Dammit. I'm broke.

Interesting enough, Paul is about to turn 64. How does that change the meaning of his song When I'm 64? Some things seem so far away and out of reach, and then they sneak up and pounce.

Satan is my motor

2005-11-11T16:33:00.000-06:00

Here's the update: Tonight is my third night of training at Olive Garden, the OG as it is being called around here. By Monday I'll be a big girl and wait tables all by myself.

So far I quit smoking, drinking diet soda and imbibing large quantities of alcohol. Read: life is significantly less fun. Apparently, everything I enjoy is a death sentence.

Shannon and I are making big plans for when we have money. They involve smoking, drinking diet soda and imbibing large quantities of alcohol.

Other than that, I've been bonding with Spork the Cat. I won't be home for Thanksgiving for money issues. I will probably work the entire week of Thanksgiving. The actual day of, I am going to Fulton with the redhead to have dinner with her family. It has been awhile since I've seen her folks and been out to their beautiful house, so I am looking forward to it.

How is everyone out there doing in BlogLand? Sounds like the folks at home are having fun without me. You know, there was some wishful thinking that without me, your lives would suck. I will allow you to have fun without me.....I guess.

If you don't want to hear me bitch, don't read this.

2005-11-07T16:31:00.000-06:00

I had my second interview at David's Bridal today. I am pretty sure they are going to hire me. However, what they told me was full-time, is really part-time. The manager wants to check my references, so it will be at least Wednesday, if not Friday before they call me to let me know for sure. I think if I budget down to the pennies, I can make it work for a few months.- the position becomes full-time at the end of December. Then, Bridal Christmas starts in January. I guess a lot of people are proposed to over the holidays. And then I can make fatty commission. Ug, wedding talk.

Who needs a drink...

University Guy posted a photog position today. I pounced on it, let him know I applied and asked when they would close the vacancy. He said a couple of weeks or when the list gets too long. Hopefully, know one else sees it. (God, are you listening?) Then all this job bullshit will be behind me.

It is impossible to get a bar job here. I miss my old one. I miss my social life. I miss having spending money. I miss my family. I miss my friends. And I still have to do this.

2005-11-04T02:42:00.000-06:00

Currently, money is the root of all evil in my life. Having a good paying, fun job deluded me for a while. Now I am back in the land of "jobs suck and don't pay." It is like pulling teeth to get a bar job in this town. I have two more to hit up today. I already put in my ap, and I found out when the managers are in so I can drop by. This is the only place where having a rack is not getting me a job. I am too tall, too heavy and too brunette (read: too intelligent). Its unfortunate. I think I'm a pretty good waitress...and they wouldn't have to train me much.

I did get a job at Olive Garden. Training is on Tuesday. The only bad thing is I have to be available any and all of the weekend. Monday I have my second interview with David's Bridal. The women I met were all very sweet and it pays the best of all the jobs I've interviewed for ($7.50 an hour or commission, whichever is higher...no joke. That's how bad it is here.) However, if I get the job, I would want to work weekends for sales/commission purposes. Hopefully, I walk in, I charm the second manager, I get the job and I tell Olive Garden to get bent, and continue the quest for an evening waitressing position.

In the mean time, I continue to bug the guy at the university and he continues to put me off. I need that job. I want that job. I think I might start hanging out in his office. Think if I sit there day in and day out he will just hand me over a job out of sheer frustration and annoyance? Think I can give him a twitch? I think I can :) I need to get a job so I can take the GRE and apply for grad. school in the event I do get a job through the university.

Enough about jobs. It has been beautiful here- near 80 with all the leaves turning. I've gone on a few motorcycle rides, Elliot, Shannon and I went for a hike at Rockbridge State Park. Its a really neat place. There are several caves and this place called the Devil's Ice Box which is the mouth of a huge cave that goes on for miles. You have to have splunking equipment to get far at all. Some parts are 30 feet tall and others you have to crawl through. They do canoe tours in the spring. Money pending, Shannon and I might get in on that action.

Other benefits of being back in this weird town are spending mucho time with my redheaded friend, getting coffee at the Artisan, food at any time of the day (even Sundays) and the academia in the air. I was on the quad the other day and I swear I could smell brainwaves. It was kind of electric.

Anyway, post and let me know how things are going at home. I hope everyone carved punkins last week. I helped create Aqua Teen Hunger Force via gourds. My meatwad was awesome.

2005-11-03T14:05:00.000-06:00

Second interview at Olive Garden and meeting the owner of the Thirsty Turtle this afternoon. Cross your fingers.

Really starting to miss everyone. Hope you all are going ok.

2005-11-02T02:13:00.000-06:00

I have applied for over 30 jobs. I am still jobless.

I have a second interview at David's on Monday. It looks promising, but they have really spread this process out and it is pissing me off. I applied at 15 bars. A friend is a bar manager at my least favorite, but he is supposed to call me. Going to Olive Garden today at 2:00 to meet with a manager. Going to call the rest of the bar assholes today between 2 and 4. Somebody pay me! PLEASE!

Guy at the University STILL hasn't posted job openings. I swear he is toying with me. It might never happen at this rate.

Who needs some chocolate....

2005-10-30T13:54:00.000-06:00

Had an interview at David's Bridal on Friday. I think it went well. They are supposed to call me for interview #2.

Guy at the university STILL hasn't posted the ag jobs. He emailed me and said he was going to do it last week, but he got too busy. BaH.

Need to get a job so I can get an apartment. Anyone in Springfield need a place to live for two months? Landlords aren't letting me out of my lease. Bastards.

Money, that's what I want

2005-10-25T13:30:00.000-05:00

I was home last weekend...cleaned the apartment thoroughly. Its cleaner than when I moved in. Still haven't been able to get ahold of the landlords.

All my shit is finally in MO. I am looking for a job. I've applied for 10. I have a job interview on Friday at David's Bridal. Wouldn't that be ironic with all the problems I have helped deal with for Meg's wedding.

Other than that, I think a viewing of Rocky Horror with the rugby ladies is in order this weekend...ooooh, and some pumpkin carving. And then pie. Ah yes.

Long and winding road will lead me to your door.

2005-10-19T13:10:00.000-05:00

New start- The majority of my shit is now in Columbia...and I am sore from carrying it all. I'll be here until Friday. Then, I am coming home to clean up, talk to the landlords, and throw Meg's bridal shower.

Movin on up

2005-10-14T13:51:00.000-05:00

Last night working at the DH. Come see me. Tip me. Wish me luck.

Tomorrow we are meeting at said bar for a going away party (I think I just organized my own). No, there will not be three. Only one. Don't miss it.

Move out in less than 10 days and counting....

Pick up the phone/ I know you're home/ I want you alone

2005-09-21T15:49:00.000-05:00

Worked a slow night last night. I was supposed to have the night off tonight and I had promised to babysit a friend's kids, but Dana broke her foot and I was the only one who could remotely come in- I made $5.

Sauced too much last night, so I had a sober day. It felt pretty good. I should have more of them. Fewer cigs, beers and more exercise. Who'dda thunk that might be a good idea?

Its time to blow this town. It causes perpetual brainstew funk.

Bedtime.

2005-09-08T13:25:00.000-05:00

~ick~

Work tonight....